Dinners and Movies
this past week has involved a disproportionate number of, you guessed it, dinners and movies, sometimes together, sometimes not. before i get into these escapades though, i’d like to take a moment to talk a little about my job of late. i haven’t really mentioned work in a bit i realized even though it does take up half my life so to speak. the past few weeks i have been shifted finally out of the middle east to work on a transit urban design project right here in Houston. it has been a refreshing change of scenery and pace even. except wednesday night, the day before the presentation to the client, i had to pull a few more hours than i thought i would. it was symptomatic of those times in school where you think you schedule enough time to start doing say task B at about 3:00 pm, to probably get out of the office around 6 or 7 hopefully. but things play out and you aren’t able to really devote yourself to task B till like 10:00 pm… haha. procrastination, inefficiency, simply too much work? most likely a combination of all of it. good thing, this doesn’t happen often… yet. unfortunately though, my lately developing habit of sleeping at around 1:30 and still waking up at 7:30… what’s it that? 6 hours of sleep at most? … is not helping my perkiness level at work. i get by though.
.
anyways, so yeah wednesday around 10:00 i was really thinking it would be a looong night. i did some of “task B” and then went to go ask the managing principal (who being a work-aholic was STILL there also working) to see what i had done so far and what suggestions he had. what he subsequently said totally made my day and it was funny how when someone says something unexpected but completely works in your favor, how quickly you support whatever he says. so he told me that basically i didn’t have to do task B because after some thought he thought doing task B would be counter-productive to the next day’s meeting. hell yeah! i was like… sure… i think THAT is a great idea…of course we don’t need it, of course it would actually be detrimental to the presentation. yes… i want to go home! even though it was relatively “early” (for me) at only 11 or so. but he said i didn’t have to do it and in a “yeah!” moment i packed up my shit and went home… to waste time before sleeping at like 2:00! haha.
.
the meeting itself the next day was an interesting experience but in general went off without a hitch. afterwards, i diddled daddled a bit more back at the office but since i was about to crash from my “lack” of sleep the night before, i went home early using the ubiquitous “doctor’s appointment” … and then got home and took a quick nap… before my “date” with adam. adam is a 23 year old i’ve been chatting with on match.com and initially i was very excited to finally meet him… he had a cute face, was very personable, and despite being on the opposite (younger) “life spectrum” of me… he’s 23, i figured it might be interesting to try younger men again… as oppose to my usual interest in 30 somethings. when i first met adam (we had arranged for both us to take advantage of the free entry of the museum of fine arts and just walk around looking the exhibits… which i think is a great date!... very low key and it doesn’t “have to be” focused on “conversation”) i was thinking… he has a really cute face, but is that chrome dome a purposely shaved head or is he really prematurely balding?... and also… wow, i didn’t know he had a significant beer belly. i mean, not that i have anywhere close to the perfect body, but at least my body profile isn’t easily drawn with a compass…. haha. but you know whatever. the “date” itself was a lot of fun as i just took it as an opportunity to see the museum, which i actually rarely go to, despite being a “member”. we talked about all sorts of things which is why i think museums are good date material… there’s a cornucopia of conversational fodder. anyways, despite my initial disappointments in physical expectations, i can’t deny i had a good time and that he seemed a very attractive person in a personality sense. i wouldn’t say i would throw this one out quite yet i guess. so at the end of the museum, we could have gone for dinner or coffee or whatever, but partly bc i was actually sleepy still, i decided to call it a night… gave him a hug, and said goodbye. i do think from his end though, he also had a good time, and whatever the motives may be… he did give me a call the very next day to see how i was doing. i guess that’s a good thing right?
.
i’m going to skip a little chronologically but i wanted to also talk about my other “date” this week. this would be i guess date “3” with robert, a guy i met a few weeks ago, who i have had two dinners with… both of which gave me the impression that despite enjoying robert’s company very much so… there was just no… chemistry… no real spark of interest romantically. i sometimes am amazed how the human heart works…. how is it that someone who, depending on your perspective, is very much wanting to make a “connection” with someone else… but still not able to with someone who personality wise should work? it so weird… but i guess that’s the same thing that occurred to me last year when i was dating derrick…. i mean, he had everything i think i sort of wanted… smarts, kindness, looks, funny…. but in the end…. there just was no "chemistry". and i think i’ve talked about this before… but chemistry is not “just" sexual… it’s something else about somebody you meet that makes you kind of giddy around them. with robert, i felt we could talk very easily and he’s funny and affable…. but from the get go… everything felt just “platonic”. i mean compared to adam, despite adam being a little bit out of shape, talking to him was a little mix of fun friendly talk, but also a little hint of sexual vibe and heat (not much mind you… but it was there).
.
i was just on wikipedia the other day reading about the scoville spectrum that measures “heat” of peppers… from a sweet pepper that has zero heat to shit that will burn your skin just picking them up. i wonder if we could come up with a “heat” scale for dating. let’s just say that a heat index of zero (for gay relationships) would be the same as meeting a woman that you immediately like… but obviously have no “real” interest in for something more that friendship and a heat index of 10 is meeting a man you might seriously consider having the baby of even if it meant becoming a woman, since of course said perfect man was inconveniently “straight”. haha. so anyways… i think robert would be somewhere like a 2-3 and adam a 4-5.
.
so anyways! i went to brunch sunday with robert and it was my idea, i emailed him about meeting up again because i was thinking i would take the opportunity to basically express to him his low heat index in my view… haha. brunch was fabulous, we went to farrago’s and had a splendid brunch and great conversation, half of it composed of me bitching (again) about esau horrid behavior earlier in the week. and it was in general just a very enjoyable time that i think the idea of saying “i think we should just be friends” would have completely ruined it. so like a wuss, i did it later that day via email. i tried to phrase it as diplomatically as possible saying i did have a very good time, that i just didn’t feel a romantic connection, but i was sincere about extending an offer of friendship… which was all true. its just that the fact that i have no balls is also true. oh well… i have yet to receive a reply to that email but its only been a one day. sometimes i wonder though, if maybe, in light of the paucity of dates i am having, maybe we should just “string some out”… haha… nah… ultimately i do believe its better to be single than dating a person you aren’t really all that into it for real. i just wish that more people would be cool with being just friends even after being told… “ i think we should just be friends”… or is it the people who say it… that should be more serious about what they say?
.
so haha… i haven’t really talked much about dinners or movies yet have i? well, the reason i titled this entry as such was basically because over the weekend, i watched three movies, one on every weekend night. friday my folks came into town and i had dinner with them and then watched “transformers” with them. it was actually an entertaining movie despite it being a little difficult to suspend the disbelief factor when 5 story tall robots were battling each other, causing it to rain shrapnel and buildings, and nobody seemed to be getting killed or injured. and even building themselves also seemed particular resilient to these heaps of sentient metal climbing and jumping on them.
.
my second movie of the weekend was harry potter with hector. hector had emailed me earlier in the week asking me if i wanted to go. i accepted knowing full well that esau was probably going to be there as well… so i was thoroughly surprised when he wasn’t. unfortunately he did show up for dinner after the movie. the movie itself was just ok in my opinion…. i think i chalk my less than enthusiastic appraisal of it to my not having really followed any of the books… it just felt the movie was attempting to squeeze in everything and a lot of small sub plots, introduced, were not re-solved and that all the characters except harry, were making but cameo appearances. i dunno… anyways, back to the real world and meeting my new arch nemesis… esua. haha. well, let’s just say dinner wasn’t itself particularly uncomfortable… me and esau basically just took turns talking to hector more or less. i actually think hector enjoyed the attention. haha! but me and esau basically made like only two comments to each other and when hector was away in the restroom, we didn’t say anything to each other.
.
i have come to the conclusion as of now, that i basically need time away from esau… maybe just to “cool down” from what i felt was a rude attack on me… or just to sub-consciously process the question of if i want to continue being esau’s friend… and if so, to what degree. i just know that right now, i don’t feel particularly comfortable with him and if i hung out with him and another similar occurrence happened… it might just permanently damage what salvageable friendship we have now. i have always considered esau a “good” friend… but sometimes, there comes a threshold where i think actions (especially repeated) speak louder than words... or concepts… or supposed “loyalties”. anyways… he called me next day and asked me “how long this was going to go on”… i simply said, i need time apart, and i will get back to him. simply short and sweet. i don’t feel the need to argue… to “talk it out”… i simply want to be alone… something that accomplishes the dual purpose of allowing me time to “decompress” but also in another way, maybe shows esau that when he tramples over people… they can choose to not take it anymore… and just leave… possibly making him rethink the way he does things… maybe. it will be interesting i think… figuring how to fill up my time w/o esau and his escapades.
.
well, there’s always low “heat-index” dates… haha. or actually no there isn’t. if robert never calls me back… i prob have only two more dates with adam before i give him “the” email… haha. there is one other guy who could be the best potential so far… and in a funny way, the best way i can describe him is basically as a younger ron… he’s 28 i think, and tall (6’3”), white, and very east texas. haha… we’ve exchanged a few phone calls but connecting via phone only has proven to be a challenge… so i dunno how meeting in person will work out. if something happens, you know where i’ll report it.
.
anyways, the last movie i saw over the weekend was late sunday night with mei. i met up with her and we went to go see a movie called “license to wed” which was pretty low-key, humorous… but nothing particularly noteworthy. i think i’ve seen enough movies…. at least till next weekend.
.
.
anyways, so yeah wednesday around 10:00 i was really thinking it would be a looong night. i did some of “task B” and then went to go ask the managing principal (who being a work-aholic was STILL there also working) to see what i had done so far and what suggestions he had. what he subsequently said totally made my day and it was funny how when someone says something unexpected but completely works in your favor, how quickly you support whatever he says. so he told me that basically i didn’t have to do task B because after some thought he thought doing task B would be counter-productive to the next day’s meeting. hell yeah! i was like… sure… i think THAT is a great idea…of course we don’t need it, of course it would actually be detrimental to the presentation. yes… i want to go home! even though it was relatively “early” (for me) at only 11 or so. but he said i didn’t have to do it and in a “yeah!” moment i packed up my shit and went home… to waste time before sleeping at like 2:00! haha.
.
the meeting itself the next day was an interesting experience but in general went off without a hitch. afterwards, i diddled daddled a bit more back at the office but since i was about to crash from my “lack” of sleep the night before, i went home early using the ubiquitous “doctor’s appointment” … and then got home and took a quick nap… before my “date” with adam. adam is a 23 year old i’ve been chatting with on match.com and initially i was very excited to finally meet him… he had a cute face, was very personable, and despite being on the opposite (younger) “life spectrum” of me… he’s 23, i figured it might be interesting to try younger men again… as oppose to my usual interest in 30 somethings. when i first met adam (we had arranged for both us to take advantage of the free entry of the museum of fine arts and just walk around looking the exhibits… which i think is a great date!... very low key and it doesn’t “have to be” focused on “conversation”) i was thinking… he has a really cute face, but is that chrome dome a purposely shaved head or is he really prematurely balding?... and also… wow, i didn’t know he had a significant beer belly. i mean, not that i have anywhere close to the perfect body, but at least my body profile isn’t easily drawn with a compass…. haha. but you know whatever. the “date” itself was a lot of fun as i just took it as an opportunity to see the museum, which i actually rarely go to, despite being a “member”. we talked about all sorts of things which is why i think museums are good date material… there’s a cornucopia of conversational fodder. anyways, despite my initial disappointments in physical expectations, i can’t deny i had a good time and that he seemed a very attractive person in a personality sense. i wouldn’t say i would throw this one out quite yet i guess. so at the end of the museum, we could have gone for dinner or coffee or whatever, but partly bc i was actually sleepy still, i decided to call it a night… gave him a hug, and said goodbye. i do think from his end though, he also had a good time, and whatever the motives may be… he did give me a call the very next day to see how i was doing. i guess that’s a good thing right?
.
i’m going to skip a little chronologically but i wanted to also talk about my other “date” this week. this would be i guess date “3” with robert, a guy i met a few weeks ago, who i have had two dinners with… both of which gave me the impression that despite enjoying robert’s company very much so… there was just no… chemistry… no real spark of interest romantically. i sometimes am amazed how the human heart works…. how is it that someone who, depending on your perspective, is very much wanting to make a “connection” with someone else… but still not able to with someone who personality wise should work? it so weird… but i guess that’s the same thing that occurred to me last year when i was dating derrick…. i mean, he had everything i think i sort of wanted… smarts, kindness, looks, funny…. but in the end…. there just was no "chemistry". and i think i’ve talked about this before… but chemistry is not “just" sexual… it’s something else about somebody you meet that makes you kind of giddy around them. with robert, i felt we could talk very easily and he’s funny and affable…. but from the get go… everything felt just “platonic”. i mean compared to adam, despite adam being a little bit out of shape, talking to him was a little mix of fun friendly talk, but also a little hint of sexual vibe and heat (not much mind you… but it was there).
.
i was just on wikipedia the other day reading about the scoville spectrum that measures “heat” of peppers… from a sweet pepper that has zero heat to shit that will burn your skin just picking them up. i wonder if we could come up with a “heat” scale for dating. let’s just say that a heat index of zero (for gay relationships) would be the same as meeting a woman that you immediately like… but obviously have no “real” interest in for something more that friendship and a heat index of 10 is meeting a man you might seriously consider having the baby of even if it meant becoming a woman, since of course said perfect man was inconveniently “straight”. haha. so anyways… i think robert would be somewhere like a 2-3 and adam a 4-5.
.
so anyways! i went to brunch sunday with robert and it was my idea, i emailed him about meeting up again because i was thinking i would take the opportunity to basically express to him his low heat index in my view… haha. brunch was fabulous, we went to farrago’s and had a splendid brunch and great conversation, half of it composed of me bitching (again) about esau horrid behavior earlier in the week. and it was in general just a very enjoyable time that i think the idea of saying “i think we should just be friends” would have completely ruined it. so like a wuss, i did it later that day via email. i tried to phrase it as diplomatically as possible saying i did have a very good time, that i just didn’t feel a romantic connection, but i was sincere about extending an offer of friendship… which was all true. its just that the fact that i have no balls is also true. oh well… i have yet to receive a reply to that email but its only been a one day. sometimes i wonder though, if maybe, in light of the paucity of dates i am having, maybe we should just “string some out”… haha… nah… ultimately i do believe its better to be single than dating a person you aren’t really all that into it for real. i just wish that more people would be cool with being just friends even after being told… “ i think we should just be friends”… or is it the people who say it… that should be more serious about what they say?
.
so haha… i haven’t really talked much about dinners or movies yet have i? well, the reason i titled this entry as such was basically because over the weekend, i watched three movies, one on every weekend night. friday my folks came into town and i had dinner with them and then watched “transformers” with them. it was actually an entertaining movie despite it being a little difficult to suspend the disbelief factor when 5 story tall robots were battling each other, causing it to rain shrapnel and buildings, and nobody seemed to be getting killed or injured. and even building themselves also seemed particular resilient to these heaps of sentient metal climbing and jumping on them.
.
my second movie of the weekend was harry potter with hector. hector had emailed me earlier in the week asking me if i wanted to go. i accepted knowing full well that esau was probably going to be there as well… so i was thoroughly surprised when he wasn’t. unfortunately he did show up for dinner after the movie. the movie itself was just ok in my opinion…. i think i chalk my less than enthusiastic appraisal of it to my not having really followed any of the books… it just felt the movie was attempting to squeeze in everything and a lot of small sub plots, introduced, were not re-solved and that all the characters except harry, were making but cameo appearances. i dunno… anyways, back to the real world and meeting my new arch nemesis… esua. haha. well, let’s just say dinner wasn’t itself particularly uncomfortable… me and esau basically just took turns talking to hector more or less. i actually think hector enjoyed the attention. haha! but me and esau basically made like only two comments to each other and when hector was away in the restroom, we didn’t say anything to each other.
.
i have come to the conclusion as of now, that i basically need time away from esau… maybe just to “cool down” from what i felt was a rude attack on me… or just to sub-consciously process the question of if i want to continue being esau’s friend… and if so, to what degree. i just know that right now, i don’t feel particularly comfortable with him and if i hung out with him and another similar occurrence happened… it might just permanently damage what salvageable friendship we have now. i have always considered esau a “good” friend… but sometimes, there comes a threshold where i think actions (especially repeated) speak louder than words... or concepts… or supposed “loyalties”. anyways… he called me next day and asked me “how long this was going to go on”… i simply said, i need time apart, and i will get back to him. simply short and sweet. i don’t feel the need to argue… to “talk it out”… i simply want to be alone… something that accomplishes the dual purpose of allowing me time to “decompress” but also in another way, maybe shows esau that when he tramples over people… they can choose to not take it anymore… and just leave… possibly making him rethink the way he does things… maybe. it will be interesting i think… figuring how to fill up my time w/o esau and his escapades.
.
well, there’s always low “heat-index” dates… haha. or actually no there isn’t. if robert never calls me back… i prob have only two more dates with adam before i give him “the” email… haha. there is one other guy who could be the best potential so far… and in a funny way, the best way i can describe him is basically as a younger ron… he’s 28 i think, and tall (6’3”), white, and very east texas. haha… we’ve exchanged a few phone calls but connecting via phone only has proven to be a challenge… so i dunno how meeting in person will work out. if something happens, you know where i’ll report it.
.
anyways, the last movie i saw over the weekend was late sunday night with mei. i met up with her and we went to go see a movie called “license to wed” which was pretty low-key, humorous… but nothing particularly noteworthy. i think i’ve seen enough movies…. at least till next weekend.
.
posted by faux chink @ 4:24 PM
1 Comments:
We are living parallel lives! I am having the same sort of reaction to my "Alex"! I like him, but so far, no chemistry. I love that you dated a Derrik too. this is getting weird... ;)
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