11.20.2006

Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder & Other Trivial Discoveries

again, i have to apologize for being lax about putting up an entry. i did however, as you who do read this, hopefully have noticed, that i've changed the look of my blog a tad. pretty superficial, just like switching around your furniture. anyways, hope you like it, if nothing else, something new to look at.
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so my god, what has happened? i'm just going to go stream of consciousness on you baby because i don't know really where to start. it has been a busy few weeks though. if nothing else, work is a great example. for the past two weeks, i've probably put in more "overtime" than all the overtime i ever put in combined prior to the last two weeks. it was mainly for this karachi project that i am working on, with a guy i swear that has adhd. and i'm not the only one who thinks so, it seems this fellow has a distinct reputation for just being difficult to work with. nice guy, sucky partner in work. why? the boy loves "coordination" meetings, is a control freak, but fucking has the attention span of a gnat's ass, and can't sit still long enough to get anything sizable done... and if he did... works sooooo slow! reason being that it seems he finds no problem in "living" at the firm more or less, hey... some free meals bc of overtime is cool.... but I LIKE going home! anyways, one evening which i'll try to forget... i did stay till like 12 AM... i know that's really nothing compared to school... but STILL... i am NOT a grad student anymore. haha... seriously though... all in all... i probably put in at least 3 extra days of overtime. and the kicker is, since i am salary... there is no "overtime"... so i just hope my adherence to the job and team spirit have been obvious to my boss... who, just recently got promoted to "principal". actually that's kind of cool... at least if i am to be a "right-hand" man... more like a personal assistant sometimes... might as well be one to "the" man! anyways... i think i am showing a good leaf though. funny, i only started working for this guy on the premise that it would be a "bridge" week between my first project at SWA and then my supposed china trip (that never happened!)... but hey... that got pushed back... and back... and back... and now well... i'm part of the middle east crew now! haha... i was perusing the client job proposal letter today and realized that i am listed as a project "landscape" architect... HAHA! at least i'm not on the bottom rung of the pay scale... just second to bottom rung haha!
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anyways, the only other thing i can remember work related that was sort of interesting, was a pot luck lunch as an early thanksgiving at the office... just people bringing food... not much thanking actually haha. anyways, i originally was going to make my famous roasted duck and i did freaking buy all the ingredients (also stuff for the chesnut and mushroom soup i made back on that thanksgiving i had with robert in jersey) but i realized... why the fuck should i spend like $80 and hours of prep and cooking... to feed "work" people... i rather share it with family... and earn real brownie points! haha. so i chickened out and just bough my roast duck... and even worse... just got my folks to go buy it. haha. hey ... what works works. after i made my roast duck dinner (for mei's return from taiwan... yes she is finally back.. she's been gone for 2 months!)... the leftovers i took to work... to prove to my co-workers... who are like asian martha stewarts... that i also had some mojo in the kitchen.
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i am not sure if i have mentioned this, but i do interviews for harvard applicants... its just the relatively informal interviews that alumni give to local applicants... but its kind of fun. i had three kids, the past 2-3 weeks... all asian... and funny enough... all in order of how much i was impressed by then... first... not so much... second... better.... third.... i really hope he gets in. no biases... but 2 girls, 1 boy... and the boy was definitely the winner! anyways... it was just fun to dig into the brains of these 17 year olds... and it made me wonder if i was being too hard. my main gripe was that most of these kids didn't really grasp "why" they wanted to succeed... there was not real "passion" or "motivation" that was personal.. that i could find. the motivations were mature.. i mean, like "hard work pays off"... or "others have sacrificed for me"... but they weren't... i dunno... "self-interested"... they weren't.... animated? i dunno... they just was no umph to their description of what moved them... or if there was... it was trite and obviously rehearsed. anyways... the one guy i did like... i wrote a glowing recommendation because i really did feel like you knew exactly where he stood on things and even better... he knew himself... where he stood... and he was comfortable and proud of it... indeed, he validated his own existence! first rate.... in my book.
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last week, during OC night, we celebrated esau's 28th birthday (god.. mine is only a measley 5 months aways... ahhh!!! i thought the 27th year was gonna be IT! heehee.... maybe it will be ;-) ) it was fun... i got a flying saucer pie that he loves and we did a whoop da whoop da. the following friday, because my urban cowboy didn't roll into town (i'll speak more of this later), i went out again to have dinner with esau at this great japanese place called Zake's (very good.. but on the weekends its ridiculously loud... literally club loudness! i just went back this evening... OMG.. the BEST hamburgers! YUM!) Esau told me a funny thing... he said... that i basically was his "best friend" now... haha... wow... crazy. but sweet. he also told me all this other shit about his current boy troubles (duty of a Best Friend) and i rolled my eyes in extreme sensitivity as i am always adept at! no serious... i could understand to some degree because that night i was feeling kind of down too.... with my own boy troubles.
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that following saturday i had an interesting experience. the chinese at work for a while have been wanting me to go to their annual "overseas chinese landscape architects" open house... say what? whatever... it was an opportunity to show people how gay i am because i can "decorate" and also show people what a pig i can be at a chinese buffet! after that, i was forced to drive into the loop again because i had apparently told esau i'd hang out... so again felt obligated to go have two beers at JRs (hector and reynel were there)... even better... Esau was late and didn't show up till about 20 minutes before i eventually left. haha... i sometimes just am not amused by that boy.
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i saw a few movies with people. i saw the queen with mr. d. and that was really good. we had dinner after that. and this evening i had dinner with him at zake's... which he loved. at first he was a little flustered because he didn't know "how" to order.... it was cute. we're in an interesting place now... we're "friends"... but at the end of the evening... we still kiss to say goodbye... not tongue now... just a very european peck. it doesn't really feel wrong, so i'll see where it goes. but i dunno... i like where we are now.
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and what a nice segue to the trivial discovery that really isn't so trivial. the "other" man in my life... my urban cowboy. this past weekend, i told him i may start calling him my retro-phile as well. both terms would be applicable to this man. but lest i digress. so that first weekend, when i ended up going to the best friend dinner with esau.... i originally had hope that UC was going to come back into houston (he usually does... but he works mainly near dallas during the week)... and i had waited and waited and waited. i eventually did just call him but his cell phone was out (he had told me he had issues with it the week prior so i wasn't all that perturbed).... but then nobody picked up at his house either. and so i didn't see or hear from him friday...or saturday... or sunday. honestly... i was feeling pretty shitty about it.
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here is a man... finally.... that for some strange reason... i feel happy with. he makes me laugh... and he intrigues me with his trivia... and he's soooo into me.... but beyond that, he just makes me interested in finding out more about him. he's one of those characters who is so embullient and overspilling with personality... but ultimately in the end, unless he wants to tell you things of any importance... you'll probably not be able to find the real "him".... i dunno... its challenging. and as i fall more and more for him... yes... i am falling for him...silly things kind of worry me... like... do we "look" right together? he's so talll.... is he just a rice queen? he's 36! but for some reason... alot of those reservations just seem to blow away when i think about how much fun i have with him and how for some strange reason... he feels good to lay next too. there is one thing of a physical nature that i don't like of him right now.... which is one of those weird things i see as "signs"... his hands don't really fit mine when we hold hands... for some reason... they feel "bony" to me.... i dunno. but lest i digress.... so i eventually found out... he didn't come into town that weekend because he was swamped with work... AND well.. he says... he was so busy he didn't have a chance to call until Monday.... well at least it was Monday. and it did sound like he was genuinely apologetic for not calling and also not being able to come... which i appreciated.
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but it was my reaction that weekend... that just sullen mood of trying to get "over" it as fast as possible because somehow i have already decided that there again was another man... who seemed like such a good mutual connection... but then wasn't really so mutual.... and now he has jetted! well... there hasn't been that many men for god's sake..... brian was only one... fantastic... date... and then he disappeared (after talking for another week!) and actually what i did to danny is similar... to this day... i'm not proud of just jetting out of his life w/o even a goodbye... but i did TRY once i remember... when we went to that play.... i just didn't have the balls to say it. GOD! trauma from the John and Adam experience... oh my god... another cryer! anyways... i dunno... UC has me hooked on him.
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and so that's why i was so happy...actually was happy.... that he came in this weekend. i met his interesting roommate... and there's one thing i have to ask UC about... why he's all weird and non-affectionate when she's around... i'm pretty sure she's knows he's gay... but then again... he's told me that he hasn't ever had "the" talk with his folks... but that his mom has invited his previous boyfriend over for christmas and all that jazz before. anyways...we'll see. i spent the night with UC AGAIN friday night.... telling my folks that i had gotten drunk... haha... i dunno if that will in the end be a good effect or not. but i did want to stay and it was too late too make a more pleasing reason plausible. we had great sex that night... not that we ever have had "bad" sex... but i dunno... that night it was awesome... awesome... haha.
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i saw him saturday and sunday... saturday for him making steaks (YUM!) and hanging out really with his roommate as well...who is fine enough. and sunday he came over to "my" side of town and we had noodles and walked around the hong kong city mall. i told him he was the first white "boy" i brought to that place... which is true... since i haven't really lived here, or even gotten a chance to seriously "date". i also somewhat broached the "dating" question. in conversation the difference between being a slut and dating came up... i said i think they are two different things... and he asked what about "slutty" dating... i said... no, then that simply isn't dating then. and he asked... what are we?... and i said... we're dating. later that night.... i repeated it again...saying... i think we're dating... and he said... yeah.
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i think i'd like to "date" him... no.. i am sure i would like to...not sure yet about the boyfriend thing yet. but definitely potential. of all the "dates" i've had since moving here (it's almost 6 months!)... UC has been the one by far who has somehow strangely stolen my heart. i'm cheesy enough to text him saying "have a good week... i miss you already"... what a dumb fuck i am. well... this has been the third weekend that i have spent pretty much WITH him... 6 weeks since we had that faithful hookup... haha.... funny ways i land myself into "relationships"...we're totally gonna have to work on a cover story! so i dunno... maybe this coming weekend or next i'll ask him if he wants to "date exclusively"... who knows... he may be seeing someone else already... you just never know. and honestly i shouldn't get myself worked up... there's plenty of reason he's NOT the right one.... if we're really critical.
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funny thing is... if we just look at what's really important, i.e. he makes me smile just being himself... he's a great catch. and my heart, right now, does linger for his presence, and in his absense, it does, it does... grow fonder.
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posted by faux chink @ 11:05 PM 1 comments

11.07.2006

One Fine Year

we made it readers ... the one year mark. i have been detailing my usually uninteresting and meandering life with excessive verbarrhea, to the chagrin of only the faithful of faithful. thank god that amount to the grand number of zero.
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hmmm, one might wonder if i've made any "progress" since starting this electronic format up, sitting in gund, on a most likely cold cambridge evening, one year ago? well... i'm still single (technically), i have another useless degree underneath my belt, i have a home in the works, and a small degree of peace in my life. not too bad... can't win them all.
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my first article was about a goddamn fruit.... a forced attempt to clever and funny, but ultimately trite and meaningless. but hey, try try again... evntually you'll find some moments of distinct inspiration in this annual.... i hope. i've tried my best. i hope you who do read occasionally, have enjoyed some of the ride. it's me, soul and life bared for all to see... well, most of it.
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being forever an optimist... it has been one fine year.

posted by faux chink @ 12:33 AM 0 comments

11.05.2006

One Fine Weekend

i had a most atypical weekend. it started off on a somewhat of a bad note, as during the work day on friday, i was coming down with something distinctively resembling a 24 hour cold... damn, there goes the weekend i thought. after a somewhat inopportune coordination meeting at 5:00, that let up at 6:30, i was in no mood to do anything fun but felt the need to as both mr. d. and esau had previously earlier in the week had dibbed some of my weekend time. i called mr. d. saying i was sick, which i was, and wasn't in the mood to go out... which he more than understood. esau did as well when i called him. by the time i go home my nose was a running faucet but still, during the drive home, i kept thinking of this new guy i have been seeing, having spent an evening with him last week while my parents were out of town. we had talked earlier in the day because he was getting back into town and wanted to spend the weekend with me. i honestly did too. there's something about this guy i really honestly like... not exactly sure what it is though.
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he finally called me after i had gotten home and taken a hot shower and was about to take a nap, and eventhough i told him i might be coming down with something, he said he'd still love to hang out. maybe it's his genuine adamancy to spend time together... and time that is actually spent together, as i will soon recount. so i said to him... "caveat emptor"... he replied... "come on down". it made me smile. i said, i'd like to come over and watch a movie, chill out, have pizza... which i did. it was something low-key that felt just right. and by that time, the meds had started to kick in and at least the faucet was manageable. so i went over to his house, and had just a fun time really... again. i spent the night again, this time using the excuse to my folks that i was going to a friend's party and since there was a lack of beds in our house (we were hosting guests)... i figure i'd just sleep at my "friend's". and so i spent the night, and as before, caught myself in moments, just looking at this man, and feeling... hmmm... good. he has what i'd say to be... kind... eyes. and did i mention he's funny? love it.
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the next morning, we woke up lazily and he made me coffee, and i had to leave for a previous engagement. we said goodbye, i wasn't sure if i was actually going to see him again over the weekend, but i had a mind too i was thinking. saturday was spent having a dim sum get together with family and friends and the guests who came over from taiwan... in short, a religious dude who came to "bless" my parents' property but apparently discovered that it was not the "right" year to move earth... to some disappointment to my folks but with understanding as well. well, after lunch, this guy was also gracious enough to come to my newly purchased house and do the same thing... literally... meaning, this is not the "right" year... for me either.
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let me explain, before the "right" date was suppose to be december 4th for closing and then a move in date of december 18th, just in time for christmas. as it shakes out, this guy says that i can still close on the 4th... that the house is a good house... BUT... i can't move in until next year. to be honest, when i heard that i was simply shocked at the concept of paying for a mortgage without living in the house. eventually this date even shocked me more when the "right" date was stipulated as next march. NEXT MARCH! four months away from closing. but being as zen as i am now, i began thinking about this, and realized it's really not THAT bad. eventhough i'd be paying mortgage, the four months would give me clear enough time to build all those additions to the house i was planning on spacing out throughout the years, like a porch, a deck, painting, molding, etc. etc. and when i further inquired, ultimately the ONLY limitation really is that i can't SLEEP in the house till march.... but i can still move in stuff and occupy it more or less. funny... to have a house you can't sleep in. haha. my friends are going to love this. i'm not exactly sure how this will work out really but well... better safe than sorry i guess. and ultimately the thing is... at least when i do MOVE in... it will be a complete home... and i will have garnered hopefully some good construction and carpentery experience.
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and speaking of serendipitous moments, this new guy supposedly in well adept at building decks and porches and has tools... hmmm... should i date i guy simply for his tools? haha. there's something cute in that.
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after the house seeing, i went home for a nap and then after some hectic calling to make plans... eventually ended up rushing to meet esau, hector, and reynell to watch a silly movie not really worth mentioning and then having dinner... with an animated discussion on religion.... in a good way. then i brought a bostom creme buy to the new guy and decided i just had to see him again. i do like him don't i?
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he's just so much fun. he's smart, and witty, funny, and embullient... sometimes to a fault as he loves loves loves to talk.... to the point where i think he's uncomfortable with just "being" quiet. that night we watched some TV, cuddled, then went to a local ice house and played darts... haha... played darts. what i like about him... is that he's like no one i've dated (did i just say "dated"?). he is a quintessential urban cowboy. texas raised and proud, but worldy, cultured, and open minded... politically aware, passionate, and kind. alot of things i wish i was. hmmm... its again one of those situation where i wonder... what do i bring to the table? but so far... he seems content that its just me.
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over darts there were small comments that kind of made me giggle inside in a good way... like asking if i might be interested in going up to a cabin for a weekend.... or a somewhat more serious (but not really) question of if i'd consider moving somewhere else. hmmm. i dunno. we came back... watched another movie while we cuddled (he's so good to just hold and be held by... despite our height differences... he's 6'1"!) and then went to bed. it was by then 4 AM and i had a very long day already... we just held each other to sleep. it was very nice. my excuse of spending the night outside my house was again that there were no beds and that i had to go to work the next day on sunday... which i did.
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waking up again holding him, being held... rocks. i do miss it. and he "tried" to make me breakfast. haha... sweet. and he played a song to me that he said reminded him of me.... because it was beautiful. haha... sweet. there is definitely a dash of romance about my urban cowboy. that will be his name... my urban cowboy.
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sunday i did go to work for a few hours to get some shit out of the way in prep for what i think might be a very busy work week (last time i thought that, i worked two days ... and was bored for three)... but who knows. after that i came home... after what seem a very long time, worked out my financing for the house with my mom, did some paper work, and then decided to put off mr. d. till monday (we were suppose to have dinner and a movie). i had some quiet time with the folks.... it was nice.
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my cold disappeared in the whirl of people and places i eexperienced this weekend. over these two days or so i think i traversed over 200 miles going back and forth between the inner loop and home. the only real bummer about not living in the house i'm buying is that i'll have to continue dealing with this amazingly annoying traffic. ahhh.... c'est la vie. who knows... maybe this means i will be staying with my urban cowboy alot more. hmm, that did make me smile when i wrote that.
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good weekend.

posted by faux chink @ 10:51 PM 0 comments

11.01.2006

Boy Who Can Sing... Yowza.

posted by faux chink @ 12:27 AM 0 comments